I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
How does it feel to date your dad?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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