i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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