what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
