yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
