I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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