Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
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Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
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we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize