I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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