we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
