hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
he wants to bone in the snuggie
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
