I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize