I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
