Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
