just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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