Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
