I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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