i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
