stop calling my apartment porn island.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
