Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
