he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Randomize
