Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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