i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
