I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
