She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
