I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
