I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize