Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I am available for nakedness
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
