I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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