Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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