Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
