Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
