Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
How external is "for external use only"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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