You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
