Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
