First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize