Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
