if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
