he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't put those talents on a resume
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize