So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
