it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
