he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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