The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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