She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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