Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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