using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
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the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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