My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
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