I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
