Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
It can also be a hat.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up