HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.