butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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