He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize