I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
